Friday, February 19, 2010

What. The. Fuck.

It's friiiiiiiday.
I'm scared, blog. The fucking world is going to hell in quite the lovely little hand basket.
Take a look around. Some maniac set his house on fire and then crashed an airplane in to the side of a building. Gary Coleman is a woman beater. So is Warren Sapp. Disturbing shit, innit?
Here's the kicker though. I saw a sure sign of the absolute deterioration of our people and society on my way to work this morning. There is no hope for us whatsoever.

I saw a bike parked outside of a coffee shop. Normal enough... Upon taking a closer look there is a headpiece on it. To be more specific there were fake dreadlocks resting on the handle bars.

So many things wrong with this.
First off. Helmet, my friend. You are supposed to be wearing a helmet. See the skull protects the brain. To keep everything hunky dorey in there you want to have a solid outer shell covering the skull. A piece of mesh with dangling fake dreadlocks is not going to protect the skull. Not even a little bit.
Secondly, who the fuck would want fake dreadlocks? Okay blog, I don't know if I've vocalized my hatred for hippies in this space. Suffice it to say they make my fucking skin crawl. You are disgusting/hairy/smelly and are a frat boy with bad hygiene and a "it's all cool, brah" outlook on life. That is it. Seriously the hippy and frat boy are doing the same things with a different delivery. They are both elitist and will look down their nose at anyone that does not conform with their distinct outlook on life. I can't fucking stand it. So the thought that someone would want to "fake the funk" of a hippy makes me vomit in my mouth.
Thirdly, you're aping a ridiculous culture that was built around drugs and laziness and are so lazy that you can not even be bothered to commit to it enough to grow your own fucking dreadlocks.

Jesus Christ.

I also saw a crossing guard in a school zone standing inside a cleaners waiting for people to walk near the intersection and then coming out to assist them with crossing. Unbelievable.

Ugh. Whatever. It's Friday.
I got paid.... Not enough.
I'm going home to cook some Chicken Cordon Bleu and fried rice. I will then be drinking until this work week just kind of washes away. Call me a frat boy.

Also, I received my Chicago magazine yesterday.
It was the 100 Best Bars issue...
You know where this is going?
Yep. You got it. Revolution Brewing was featured. They've been opened 3 months. Get over there, already.

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